Father's Day · Sunday 6 September
A perfectly polite black ceramic mug with a secret on the bottom. He won't see it coming until the last mouthful.
Ceramic · 350ml · Gloss black
A perfectly polite mug with a secret at the bottom. They only find out once it's far too late to be offended politely.
The specification
We could have made this cheaply. Instead we made it well, so the joke outlives the person you gave it to.
350ml of proper stoneware under a deep gloss glaze. It has the weight of a mug someone actually chose, not one they were handed at a conference.
Fired into the glaze rather than stuck on top. Dishwasher after dishwasher, the message stays exactly as rude as the day it arrived.
For the coffee you forgot about at 9:40am. And again at eleven. We're not here to judge.
Wide enough for two fingers, weighted so the reveal lands at exactly the right moment.
It has never once failed to land. Kris Kringle, Father's Day, or the colleague who keeps taking your parking space.
Nothing on the outside gives it away. Plausible deniability included at no extra charge.
Gloss black ceramic, 350ml. Nothing about it announces itself, which is precisely the point.
The design lives inside the glaze rather than sitting on top of it. It will comfortably outlast the friendship.
Somewhere past sixty degrees, the message becomes legible. By then the coffee is gone and so is the goodwill.
One for the desk. One for the person who has earned it. Free shipping once you commit to both.
The occasion
Kris Kringle. The leaving gift for the colleague nobody will miss. A housemate who keeps borrowing your oat milk. Father's Day, when you've run out of ideas and sincerity in the same afternoon.
It works because it commits. There is no wink on the outside — just a well-made black mug doing a convincing impression of good manners, right up until the last second.
In the wild
Questions
Orders are dispatched within 1–2 business days. Standard delivery to Australian metro addresses usually lands in 7–14 business days; regional, WA and NT addresses can take a little longer. Tracking is emailed to you the moment it ships.
Stock is fulfilled by our overseas manufacturing partner and shipped directly to you. That's how a properly made ceramic mug stays at this price instead of being marked up three times on the way to your door.
Yes. The design is fired into the glaze rather than printed on top, so it won't peel, fade or crack in the dishwasher. Microwave safe as well.
350ml — a standard large mug. Roughly 9.5cm tall and 8cm across, with a handle wide enough for two fingers.
30 days from delivery. If it arrives damaged, or it simply isn't what you hoped, email us and we'll arrange a replacement or a refund. You don't need to explain yourself.
That depends entirely on your workplace, and we accept no responsibility for your judgement. It is, however, reliably the best thing at a Kris Kringle.
One mug. One message.
Free shipping over $50. 30-day returns. No explanation required — from you or from us.
Dispatched in 1–2 business days
10%off
First order only
Join the list and we'll send a code for 10% off your first order. No spam, no daily nonsense — just the occasional excuse to be rude to someone you love.
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Tap to copy it, then paste it at checkout. We've emailed you a copy too.
Shop the mug10% off first order only. One use per customer. Cannot be combined with other offers.
